My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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