i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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