i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
