i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
