Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
