You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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