Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize