So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
