i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
