if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"