sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
There's always time for handjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He did a backflip because drugs
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