I just pynch a tree in the face
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
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I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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