we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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