With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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