Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I am puke
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
