im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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