I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize