just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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