sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
