i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Randomize
