There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
