I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize