i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
