when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
