If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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