Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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