Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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