Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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