i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
