last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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