okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize