Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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