Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
