bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Did I show you my penis last night?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
