Cold hands, warm shart.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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