Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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