You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
