he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
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