Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
