seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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