I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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