this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
