Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
tequila makes me forget i have legs
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
