If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
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