mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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