You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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