So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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