By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
