This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
