8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
