I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
